Chapter 48

 Pei Yuan muttered under his breath, ignoring him, and leaned against the bedpost next to Bao Ning, seeming to want to take things further.

Qiu Mingshan became increasingly anxious, knocking on the door urgently. "Yuan'er, I know you're inside. Why aren't you responding?"

"The General is calling for you," Bao Ning pushed Pei Yuan lightly in the chest, feeling relieved. "It must be something important. You should go."

She was feeling the effects of alcohol, her cheeks starting to flush, and her breath carried a sweet, boozy aroma.

Pei Yuan gritted his teeth, unwilling to part from Bao Ning. He reached under her clothes and grasped her delicate skin forcefully, then bit her cheek lightly before throwing on an outer garment and heading out.

Watching his departing figure, Bao Ning sighed inwardly, feeling relieved.

She and Pei Yuan were accustomed to embracing and occasional kisses, but she couldn't resist this deeper intimacy, feeling both nervous and conflicted.

Moreover, Pei Yuan had just hurt her.

Bao Ning's mind was foggy with various thoughts, feeling full and a bit dizzy from the alcohol. She sat on the bed, lost in thought for a while before drifting off to sleep.

Her last thought was: Pei Yuan hadn't even washed her feet yet? She was still angry; she couldn't let him get away with it so easily tomorrow.

---

Pei Yuan gently closed the door behind him. He was wearing a wrinkled white undershirt with some stains from when he accidentally spilled wine on Bao Ning, and a loose black coat hung over his shoulders. There was a faint lingering desire in his eyes.

Rubbing his forehead, he asked hoarsely, "What's the matter?"

"Did you just go to the prison and cut off Zhou Jiangcheng's right hand?" Qiu Mingshan spun around in place, not noticing Pei Yuan's abnormal demeanor. He sighed heavily against the doorframe. "Why didn't you discuss it with me?"

"Is this matter worthy of your trip?" Pei Yuan sneered. "He rushed towards my wife in a deranged manner. Did you discuss it with me?"

"He's still a commander! How can you punish him so severely without considering the consequences? Yuan'er, you're too ruthless and decisive. How can you be so reckless!"

Qiu Mingshan sighed sadly, "Your mother was so gentle, but none of it seems to have passed on to you..." He stopped himself halfway, realizing his mistake, and looked up at Pei Yuan with a guilty expression.

The smile on Pei Yuan's face faded, replaced by a cold and indifferent expression.

Qiu Mingshan tried to explain, "I didn't mean you're not..."

Pei Yuan stared at him with disappointment and resentment in his eyes, cutting him off sharply, "After disrespecting her like that, how can you still have the nerve to mention her in front of her son?"

A flicker of guilt passed through Qiu Mingshan's eyes. He opened his mouth to say something, but Pei Yuan interrupted him.

"Zhou Jiangcheng was already unfit for duty. He might be good at training soldiers, but he's reckless and lacks strategy, similar to Zhang Fei's role. Using him as a commander would lead to disaster, as evidenced by the Tiger Talisman incident. General, you commanded the winds and clouds ten years ago, but now you're so nostalgic and weak? Zhou Jiangcheng should have died long ago. Moreover, I didn't take his life; I just cut off the hand he used to touch my wife."

Qiu Mingshan was speechless. The two stood at the door in silence for a while before Pei Yuan turned away. "If there's nothing else, go back to sleep."

Qiu Mingshan hurriedly said, "Why can't you just have a proper conversation with me?"

"I can't." Pei Yuan glanced at him, annoyed. "You're ruining my good mood."

Only then did Qiu Mingshan notice Pei Yuan's disheveled clothes and a faint smell of alcohol. He felt embarrassed and stepped back, saying, "I..."

Without waiting for him to finish, Pei Yuan slammed the door in his face and went inside.

---

There was a loud bang at the door. Bao Ning frowned and woke up for a moment, rolling over to see Pei Yuan walking towards her.

He first went to the side of the cabinet, as if he was going to take something, but changed direction when he saw her move, coming to sit beside her. "Did I wake you?"

"Mm." Bao Ning mumbled in agreement, feeling dizzy. She covered her eyes with her wrist to block the light, looking a bit coquettish. "I want to sleep."

Pei Yuan walked over and blew out the lamp, then fumbled in the dark and took out a small box, sitting down beside her.

He shook the small box, the lock clicking softly, but he hesitated to open it. Bao Ning lifted her eyelids to see his serious expression.

In a daze, Bao Ning remembered the first time she saw Qiu Mingshan in the courtyard. Pei Yuan had also taken out this small box and sat on the kang, looking at it for a long time.

There seemed to be a secret inside.

Bao Ning murmured, "What are you doing?"

Pei Yuan stopped, putting the box aside and instead leaning over her, using his thumb to stroke and rub her face. "Ningning, talk to me."

Bao Ning felt ticklish and annoyed by him. She pulled the blanket over her head, her voice muffled, "Talk tomorrow. I want to sleep."

Pei Yuan pulled down her blanket, poking her soft cheek with his finger. "Are you drunk?"

"You're so annoying." Bao Ning's voice was soft, resisting as she pushed Pei Yuan's face away. "If you can't sleep, go walk in the courtyard. Don't disturb me."

Pei Yuan remained silent for a while. Bao Ning thought he was going to sleep, but suddenly he leaned over again, whispering in her ear, "If you knew what kind of person I really am, would you still be willing to stay with me?"

Bao Ning couldn't hear clearly and responded vaguely.

"I've killed many people, good and bad ones. Did you know?" Pei Yuan continued, "Actually, when I said I was going to fetch vegetables, I lied to you. I went somewhere else halfway. I cut off Zhou Jiangcheng's hand. He's not dead yet, but he'll die soon. I've already thought about how he'll die. How about throwing him to the Potter's Field to feed the dogs?"

"Similar to Feng Yongjia's death. Do you remember him? I tied his hands and feet and threw him into the deserted grave. He must have scared himself to death, or maybe he was eaten by wolves or dogs. I don't pity him. He deserved to die, but would you pity him?"

"And Xu Guang, I cut him in half from the waist before he died. I burned him while he was still alive."

Pei Yuan spoke softly, wanting her to hear but also not wanting her to hear.

In his slow tone, Bao Ning fell asleep, breathing steadily. Pei Yuan watched her chest rise and fall, smiled faintly, and finally relaxed.

Deep down, he actually didn't want Bao Ning to know.

Being the person he was, it was hard not to attract others' disdainful looks—madman, Yama, reincarnation of an evil spirit—Pei Yuan had long grown accustomed to such titles, but he feared that Bao Ning would see him in the same light.

Pei Yuan recalled that night when Zhou Jiangcheng fell to the ground, and he threw his sword, slicing through Zhou Jiangcheng's neck. He remembered Bao Ning's panic. She must be afraid of him being like this.

But he didn't want to keep pretending like this.

Pei Yuan's index finger twisted around Bao Ning's hair as he whispered, "Am I a cruel person?"

"My mother died when I was unable to protect her." Pei Yuan kissed Bao Ning's cheek. "I can't bear to witness such things happening again. So, anyone who dares to harm what is precious to me, I will step ahead of them, kill them, and make them suffer the most painful punishment."

"In this world, the kind are often bullied by others. Those who do wrong should pay the price. The strong are the ones who decide life and death."

"Bao Ning, if one day you find out that those rumors outside are true, that my hands are stained with blood, that I am a madman, not the gentle and kind person you expect, don't think what I do is disgusting... Don't leave."

Pei Yuan gently nibbled on her earlobe. "I promised you, I will never hurt you."

He muttered to himself so much, and Bao Ning slept peacefully, with only a half-sleepy sheep and a awake dog listening.

Pei Yuan found himself quite amusing, behaving like a lovesick girl, nothing like himself at all.

But sometimes emotions come inexplicably, and the suppressed faint anxiety is ignited in an instant. He was never a normal person to begin with, extremist and indifferent to good and evil, indifferent to life and death. Sometimes good, sometimes bad, his whole body flowing with nauseating blood. Even without disabilities, he was destined to be someone who lived in the abyss.

Now he figured it out.

...

The next morning, Bao Ning woke up late. Indeed, she couldn't handle even a drop of alcohol. After getting up, she still felt heavy, possibly because she hadn't slept well last night.

Pei Yuan had been talking incessantly for half the night. She didn't catch a single word, and finally managed to fall asleep. He disturbed her so much that her dreams were filled with a group of monks chanting loudly.

As the sky brightened, sunlight filtered through the thin window paper, casting a soft halo on her face. Ah Huang had already finished eating and was nudging her neck with his buttocks.

Bao Ning subconsciously reached out to touch where Pei Yuan should be, only to realize he had been gone for a while.

Bao Ning's heart skipped a beat. She quickly sat up, looking bewildered and aggrieved. He had been fine yesterday, had been with her these past few days, and suddenly he was nowhere to be found.

A sweet milk fragrance wafted over. Ah Huang sniffed it first, raising his neck to look outside. The little lamb was bleating at the door; it was feeding time.

Bao Ning puzzledly got out of bed, leaning against the door frame to look outside. She saw Pei Yuan's broad back. He had moved a stool to the doorway, facing away from her, with the little lamb in his arms, stiffly feeding it.

Mrs. Liu whispered beside her, "Fourth Prince, Fourth Prince, take it slow. Don't hurt its tongue."

"Why is it so delicate?" Pei Yuan impatiently replied, "Go to the kitchen, get an oil funnel, stuff it in its mouth, pour a bowl of milk in."

"Oh no, we can't do that." Mrs. Liu waved her hands repeatedly, "It's still a newborn lamb, and it's sick. How can we use such methods as feeding ducks?"

Pei Yuan said, "Feeding it spoon by spoon, when will it end?"

"It'll be done in a quarter of an hour. Madam has always fed it like this." Mrs. Liu carefully coaxed him, "Fourth Prince, be patient. Madam will be happy when she sees you later."

Pei Yuan nodded and patted the lamb's face. "Open your mouth, take another bite."

Bao Ning couldn't help but laugh. Ah Huang barked and rushed out to Pei Yuan, scraping his knees with both paws, raising his head high to eat too.

Pei Yuan let Mrs. Liu take it away. Holding the little lamb, he turned around and looked at Bao Ning. His chin lifted slightly, showing some disdain, "Look at the great job you gave me, haven't had breakfast yet in the morning, and I have to feed this little animal first."

Bao Ning hid half of her face behind the curtain, smiling at him. "Isn't it cute?"

Pei Yuan lowered his head, fingers scratching the lamb's ears. "It's just like that."

He looked up again. "Not as cute as you."

Bao Ning laughed even more happily. Mrs. Liu had never seen them so openly flirting like this, her old face blushing, quickly retreating.

"Don't laugh foolishly. Hurry up and come out to wash your face and comb your hair." Pei Yuan raised an eyebrow at her. "After eating, I'll take you out to play."

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