Chapter 33

The evening self-study session at Sanzhong Third High School ended at 9:30 PM. Yu Luoyin met with the private detective who had called him at a high-end café named "Priceless but Unmarketable" not far from the school, coming straight after school ended.

The young man's porcelain-white face, drained of color either by the cold wind or some other cause, was as pale as paper, and between his ink-black brows was a deep-seated resentment. His appearance startled the suited adult sitting across from him.

"Master Yu, are you...?" The man hesitated. "Feeling unwell?"

"It's nothing." Yu Luoyin waved a hand, his voice grim. "Let's get to the point."

Three days ago, through his own channels, he had contacted a private detective named Ren Yu to investigate some matters—a investigation into the past of Bai Xunyin.

Yu Luoyin knew he was being somewhat despicable, but righteous methods couldn't win back the girl. He had no choice but to resort to this.

"Master Yu, here is the information about the girl you asked me to investigate." Ren Yu pushed a thin folder in front of Yu Luoyin, his expression grave.

Yu Luoyin glanced down at the folder, knowing it contained aspects of Bai Xunyin's past that he couldn't touch.

He then rubbed his frozen hands, untied the buttoned string around the folder.

Several sheets of paper fell out of the folder, filled with Bai Xunyin's life history.

Yu Luoyin looked down, more serious than when reading an exam paper, but seeming unable to understand the simple black and white text, his expression grew more solemn and serious.

He unconsciously squeezed the paper with his fingers, as if to tear the thin paper.

Especially when he read "Bai Hongsheng, father of Bai Xunyin, fell to his death due to debts," his pupils contracted rapidly—

"Master Yu, your classmate Bai Xunyin's father Bai Hongsheng was a businessman in logistics. Their family was relatively well-off in the early years, but during the financial crisis and stock market crash, small and medium-sized enterprises like theirs became cannon fodder... The Bai family became cannon fodder too."

"They went bankrupt, owed a lot of debts, mortgaged the house to the bank, but it still wasn't enough. In the end, they could only resort to borrowing high-interest loans to pay off their debts." Ren Yu sighed. "It is said that Bai Hongsheng was chased by debtors to the rooftop and jumped to his death. His daughter, Bai Xunyin, was beside him when it happened."

Yu Luoyin suddenly raised his head, his eyes tightly fixed on him. "What did you say?"

"That year was after Bai Xunyin graduated from junior high school and finished her college entrance exam. She and Bai Hongsheng were chased by creditors to the rooftop. Later, the ambulance came..." Ren Yu paused, cautiously saying, "Only one person was injured, but both were taken to the hospital. Bai Xunyin couldn't speak because of this incident."

In medical terms, this is called post-traumatic stress disorder, also known as PTSD.

However, for a young girl like Bai Xunyin, what she experienced and had to endure was too cruel.

The more Yu Luoyin listened, the more gloomy his face became, making Ren Yu's voice involuntarily quieter—eventually silent.

His voice hoarse, he said, "Go on."

"Master Yu, look at this page." Ren Yu was a little scared, but since he was ordered, he could only continue with his scalp tingling, his throat rolling slightly. He reached out and turned a page of the information in front of Yu Luoyin, continuing to talk—

"I checked Bai Hongsheng's debts at the time. Although the debts would have grown like a snowball if not paid back in time, it was not enough to force him to jump from the building. So, I followed this reason and investigated..."

Ren Yu was obviously a very reliable and serious person, not only investigating, but also looking for other details along awkward leads. But at this point, he was obviously a little embarrassed.

"Later, I found out that those high-interest loan companies thought that Bai Hongsheng couldn't repay the debts, so they wanted to... wanted to..." Ren Yu hesitated for a long time, finally gathering his courage under Yu Luoyin's stern stare. "So they wanted to take Bai Xunyin to repay the debts. Bai Hongsheng may have jumped because of this reason."

Debt, like resentment and enmity, ends with the death of a person. If Bai Hongsheng became 'incapable of acting' or 'dead,' the debt would naturally disappear. This is a legal provision.

He died, and no one could threaten his treasure anymore.

Bai Hongsheng wanted to give Bai Xunyin and Ji Huiying a safe and worry-free life with his own blood.

This sounded a bit feeble, but it was the best choice a father could make at the time.

But for Bai Xunyin, who was still young, she couldn't accept her father dying for her, and the fact that he jumped in front of her.

The extreme trauma spread from her mind to her body, with almost no surprises.

Yu Luoyin listened quietly, like a statue made of ice.

Under the extremely suppressed aura, Ren Yu unconsciously broke out in cold sweat.

"Where?" After a long time, he opened his mouth slowly, hesitatingly, "Where was it on that day?"

"Here." Ren Yu breathed a sigh of relief, pointing to a sketch of the building's middle section on the paper. "It was the previous building of He Neng Electronics, in the middle section of the east side of the Jiguang District. After He Neng Electronics moved last year, the building was left empty."

So Bai Hongsheng jumped from the rooftop of the eighth floor. He miraculously survived as a vegetable.

Yu Luoyin stared at the mid-floor building on the black-and-white photo, his eyes becoming deeper and deeper, containing a hint of heartache.

This kind of heartache made his mentality involuntarily change from 'grievance and resentment' to 'wanting to slap himself'.

He just remembered standing in front of Bai Xunyin this afternoon and saying he wanted to pursue her again, but the girl didn't appreciate it. She just stood there, stunned for two seconds, then turned away with a cold smile and left three words on the paper, 'Impossible'.

Even though he knew he was wrong, Yu Luoyin's inherently proud nature made him still somewhat angry at such a merciless rejection.

But now, seeing Ren Yu and reading Bai Xunyin's almost bloody past, Yu Luoyin felt his scalp go numb.

On one hand, there was pity for Bai Xunyin, and on the other, regret for his past actions.

No wonder Bai Xunyin had been so out of place in the class before, distant from every classmate—it was because she probably couldn't get close to people at all.

And he had finally opened her heart, dug out her sincerity, only to discard it like trash and trample on it...

Yu Luoyin finally understood why Bai Xunyin had broken up with him so decisively after learning the truth, as if nothing could bring her back.

In his eyes, it was just a 'joking bet', but in Bai Xunyin's eyes, it was the trust and sincerity she had worked so hard to build with the outside world.

How much of a jerk was he? Yu Luoyin's face was pale, his black eyes hollow as he stared at the information on the table in front of him. For a moment, he felt a thin layer of cold sweat on his palms, moist and wet.

After a while, he slowly focused, noticing a name on the information—Mu Anping.

Ren Yu's investigation actually included Mu Anping. It was meticulous enough to show that he was a 'named person' in Bai Xunyin's past.

"This Mu Anping, his father and Bai Hongsheng were college classmates and business partners. The relationship between the two families has always been good." Ren Yu saw Yu Luoyin flipping through the page about Mu Anping and continued to explain, "The two families used to live in the same neighborhood. Mu Anping and Bai Xunyin grew up together, attending the same primary and middle schools..."

Ren Yu paused as he spoke and glanced at Yu Luoyin's expression, unconsciously swallowing a gulp of water before continuing, "Later, the Bai family went bankrupt, and their relationship gradually drifted apart."

What happened next was self-evident.

Nowadays, it's no longer a time when one side's difficulty attracts support from all sides, but rather 'husband and wife are birds of the same forest, facing great difficulties, each flying away'—many couples are like this, let alone friends?

At that time, the Bai family owed a large sum of money, and the snowball-like debt was becoming larger and larger. Before Bai Hongsheng became a vegetable, it was a real bottomless pit. Who would dare to help?

It's already considered good if people don’t kick you when you're down. How can you expect them to help you in your time of need?

Mu Anping's family moved quickly, fearing any association with the debt collectors, especially since they had previously cooperated with Bai Hongsheng. They practically moved overnight.

As for Mu Anping, this so-called 'childhood friend,' he was just a fifteen-year-old boy when the disaster struck, naturally following his parents' decisions. 

The friendship with Bai Xun Yin was just child’s play, but because of 'liking' her, he felt guilty and dejected, unable to hold his head high when he saw Bai Xun Yin.

After hearing this, Yu Luo Yin understood that there was indeed nothing between Bai Xun Yin and Mu Anping. Bai Xun Yin would never like a boy like him.

Even knowing this, Yu Luo Yin couldn’t feel happy.

To the former Bai Xun Yin, she was like a traveler walking through a cracked desert, deeply yearning for someone to extend a helping hand, even if it was just to give her a sip of water. 

Mu Anping, who grew up with her, should have had a natural trust and friendship with her, but he left without hesitation out of fear for his own safety... Bai Xun Yin must have been very sad at that time.

No wonder she lacks a sense of security and doesn't trust anyone, especially boys.

Yu Luo Yin couldn’t help but laugh self-deprecatingly, realizing that his own actions probably made things even worse for her. He clenched his fist, his knuckles turning white.

"That's about all." Ren Yu finally breathed a sigh of relief after finishing his explanation. Due to his profession, he even made a final summary: "After Bai Hongsheng's accident, he was saved but became a vegetative state. He isn't brain-dead and still has the possibility of waking up. Because of this, although most of the debt was cleared, the mother and daughter still live quite frugally, renting a small place and sending most of their money to the hospital."

No matter what, Bai Hongsheng remains a cherished hope for Bai Xun Yin and her mother. No matter how tough life gets for the living, the support in their hearts always comes from a 'dead' person.

They still want to exhaust all efforts to save their family's 'pillar.'

After Ren Yu left, Yu Luo Yin sat alone in the coffee shop for a long time, his mind filled with Ren Yu's words and the documents in front of him, feeling dizzy as if his head was about to explode.

He rubbed his temples hard, feeling so frustrated that he swore.

Why... is it so difficult?

Before this, he never imagined that the seemingly gentle and strong girl carried so much heavy past. He naively thought that Bai Xun Yin’s cold and reserved nature was only due to the teasing and bullying because she was mute, 'nothing more,' such a laughable presumption.

The truth hit him like a slap in the face, making it hard for him to breathe.

At eighteen, he finally understood what 'guilt' felt like.

What he thought didn’t matter, what he didn’t care about, and what he found trivial, all turned into bloody wounds on others.

Bai Xun Yin had previously met trash like Mu Anping, who ran far away when trouble came, and now she encountered someone like him, who deceitfully lured feelings with sweet words.

She’s truly unlucky.

Yu Luo Yin grabbed the glass on the table, gulping down half a glass of ice water in one go.

Why do people like smoking and drinking? When frustrated, these things help make memories fade temporarily, and they work best.

If it gets worse, some might turn to drugs.

Only those who truly awaken from the blows are like proud plum blossoms in the snow, embodying the 'noble spirit of a gentleman.'

Bai Xun Yin is such a person. When Yu Luo Yin saw her slender figure at school the next day, this comparison unconsciously flashed in his mind.

He closed his eyes, blocking his greedy gaze.

Today is Sunday, with only half a day of classes and the afternoon off.

Having had enough of various interest and tutoring classes since childhood, Yu Luo Yin had stopped all 'classes' since he was fifteen, purely resting on holidays.

After school, he quickly dismissed the idea of gathering with Li Yuan and others, took a taxi alone, and went to Baoquan Road, where there was a psychological counseling office.

Yu Luo Yin entered the office skillfully and said in a low voice to the bewildered receptionist, "Is Dr. Lu here?"

Lu Ying, the owner of the psychological counseling office.

"Ah, are you here to see Dr. Lu?" The receptionist hesitated, glancing at Yu Luo Yin’s school uniform, and asked, "Do you have an appointment, student?"

"No." Yu Luo Yin paused, "Please tell her my last name is Yu."

The receptionist hesitated before dialing the internal line.

Three minutes later, Yu Luo Yin walked into the office under the receptionist’s astonished gaze.

As he entered, the middle-aged woman in a white coat behind the desk looked up. With red lips, white teeth, and a charming appearance, she adjusted her glasses in surprise as she saw Yu Luo Yin sit down in front of her.

"Luo Yin, why are you here today?" Lu Ying stood up and poured him a glass of water, smiling with some emotion, "You haven’t been here for almost a year."

Yu Luo Yin smiled innocently, looking like a pure and innocent good child, "It's my fault, I should have come to see you."

"Silly boy, what are you saying? Not coming is a good thing." Lu Ying sat back, looking into Yu Luo Yin's eyes—those eyes had a calming effect, making people feel 'at ease.' She gently said, "Not coming here means you’re fine."

Yu Luo Yin smiled silently, his dark eyes gleaming with unclear emotions.

Lu Ying asked, "So, did something happen this time?"

"Sister Lu, this time it's not about me. I... want to consult a question." Yu Luo Yin carefully chose his words, taking a sip of water before slowly speaking, "I have a friend who lost their voice after witnessing some unbearable scenes."

Lu Ying was startled, "Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)?"

"Um, that’s what you call it in medicine." Yu Luo Yin nodded, straightforwardly asking, "How can it be treated?"

"That's hard to say." Lu Ying pushed up her glasses and explained clearly, "PTSD is very common now. Most patients close themselves off after experiencing extremely bad or unmanageable events. Some lose their voice, others have unconscious twitches, psychological disorders, obsessive anxiety, various phobias... there are many reactions."

"Loss of voice, as you mentioned, is actually one of the more severe types since it directly affects the functionality of a bodily organ." Lu Ying analyzed every point thoroughly.

"I guess she might have seen someone very close or important getting hurt and was so scared that she couldn't speak."

In Lu Ying's gentle narration, Yu Luo Yin’s mind was transported back to that 'nightmare' afternoon for Bai Xun Yin—

The girl must have been more delicate and fragile than she is now, like a small white flower, easily coveted by wolves.

Finally, her father protected her with his own flesh and blood, leaving her skirt and body stained with blood. She could never forget it.

"I don't know the patient's symptoms, but such extreme trauma is not easy to heal." Lu Ying analyzed with furrowed brows—

"It mainly depends on what the patient needs or longs for."

"Some people need meticulous care and might suddenly speak again after being treated for a long time."

"Some might need a certain amount of stimulation. Most people have different reactions."

"Different needs, different triggers, and different recovery times. Some might never recover in their lifetime."

...

Meticulous care? Yu Luo Yin caught Lu Ying's key point, his long eyelashes trembling slightly.

After a while, he whispered, "Thank you, Sister Lu."

Leaving the counseling office, Yu Luo Yin took a taxi directly to Bai Xun Yin's home address.

No matter what, he really wanted a chance to make it up to her.

On the way, Yu Luo Yin sent a message to Bai Xun Yin: [Are you home?]

But his phone kept vibrating with messages from his friends, and Bai Xun Yin didn't reply at all.

Yu Luo Yin frowned in frustration. When he got out of the car at Ajun Alley, the cold wind woke him up, cooling his agitated heart slightly.

He pressed his lips together and sent another message to Bai Xun Yin: [I'm downstairs at your place, can we meet?]

After sending it, Yu Luo Yin put his phone away, not planning to send a second message.

From now on, he wouldn't force Bai Xun Yin. If she didn't come down... he would just wait.

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